Chicken-wuss

Its 12:26 AM, and in less than 9 hours, I'll be making my way to my new temporary dwelling in Thornhill.

And I am scared shitless.

I was thinking about it, and I realized I've been telling everyone I'm scared because I'll be living by myself, and I won't know anyone and it'll be lonely as hell..... and I'm thinking... that's not true.

I am not scared of the move and living by myself.

I am actually afraid of the job.

The job's so formal, at an incredibly large company which makes you feel rather insignificant. But not only that, it makes asking questions harder, and unlike in my previous co op, where everything was really laid out for me, and even the stuff I had to figure out on my own didn't end up being very difficult.

But this is something else entirely. This is kinda like, you do your job, and once a week, you meet with your boss to tell him what you did and the progress. If you have any questions, you can ask him, but don't bother him too many times as he's busy, and you don't wanna sound like you don't know anything. And you look left and right and its just cubicles after cubicles..... and you don't really know where to start asking questions.....the random guy in the cubicle next to you? Or what?

GAH!

Yes, it is my firm believe that everything will work out in the end, but that doesn't make me panic any less. There's always the "this time, it'll be different" factor. Although it never is...because it somehow always works out, but I think its because of the thought that it wont that it does (does that make sense?).


Yes. Oh yah. You know I'm scared because...... I've been putting off doing anything moving related. I believe I started packing this afternoon. And only my clothes. Half of the stuff isn't even packed yet. And I'm scared. And I should be sleeping now, not worrying about packing, but I am. And I'm scared.

Oh well. I guess I'll re-commence packing now.....

Yuy Ren